And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.
-Luke 11: 9-10

last night was probably one of the best homecoming days we've had since being in the navy. some highlights were going on a date to bardo, ordering cocktails (which we rarely do because they are so expensive), and even ordering dessert just because. we were at the restaurant for more than two hours, just talking and laughing together. i realized this morning that some people may have suspected we were on our first or second date since we were having so much fun together. it made me so happy having that thought. we were going to watch sons of anarchy but we were both tired and decided to just go to bed early. it's a nice feeling to just be laying next to him in bed. there really is something so peaceful and comforting in that.
this coming week will be interesting. we are attending "tap class" through the navy monday through thursday, which are basically classes to help us learn how to tap dance. no not really, it's to help us intergrate back into the civilian world. i took work off for it, and of course they are now telling us we may not be able to attend the classes because our name is not on the list (or some nonsense like that). as i wrote that i realized that this tap class is sounding more and more like a club we can't get into.
i'm holding onto hope that it will all work out, and even if we have problems i think andy is at the point where he'll try to find our way into the class. we'll see.
and then a week from today we'll be in michigan, hanging with family and friends. our life in michigan is that much closer to being a reality. i'm pretty certain this will be the last time i visit home, unless something catastrophic happens. the next time i'm in michigan, i think it will be for good.
what a strange and surreal feeling.

On our 4 years anniversary...we'll be here.

I have no expectations of anything but change.
-Fiona Apple

It took me a long time, a span of 5 years, but I finally feel like I lived in the moment during this month long underway. I really did enjoy my time alone, my time with friends, the trip to Charleston, my parents visiting etc. I did have some days, especially at the beginning of the underway, where I missed him like crazy, but overall I feel pretty proud of the way I handled myself being separated from Andy for this long.
I'm proud of him too for being so lovely to me through email. We didn't get to communicate as much as we would have liked to, but when we did his reasurrance of how much he loved me made it ok.
He comes home tomorrow, and I am very happy about this.

I'm drawn to singers that have a mysterious, dark energy to them, I don't know why that is, but there is something so incredibly amazing about the singer of depeche mode. he makes me feel alive, especially when i listen to this song. the video is beyond ridiculous, but just listen to the yearning in his voice as he sings the lyrics "never let me down".

there is something about these lyrics that make the hairs on my arms stand straight up, and make my eyes well up with tears.

So can you understand?
Why I want a daughter while I'm still young
I wanna hold her hand
And show her some beauty
Before all this damage is done

But if it's too much to ask, it's too much to ask
Then send me a son

Me and Photography...we're back!!! And kicking!!!
and now I feel the freedom that I have never felt.